woman holding a gun contemplating suicide

I Want to Kill Myself – What Should I Do?

woman holding a gun contemplating suicide

Here is a list of the contents of “I Want to Kill Myself – What Should I Do?”:

  • Introductory Words
  • If You Are in Crisis
  • My Life Was Awful
  • How I Tried to Kill Myself (and What Happened)
  • When I Was a Teacher, These Thoughts Returned
  • I Went to Counseling to Discuss My Suicidal Thoughts and My Other Problems
  • How to Overcome Suicidal Thoughts (Hint: Start by Using Positive Affirmations)
  • Why Do People Think about Committing Suicide?
  • 11 Things to Do When You Have Suicidal Thoughts
  • 5 Things of What NOT to Do When You Are Occupied with Negative Thoughts
  • What to Do if You Feel Helpless
  • Phone Apps to Use to Help You Seek Professional Medical Attention
  • How Do You Discuss Suicide?
  • I Have Helped a Bunch of People Already
  • Why I Am Qualified to Help YOU
  • My OTHER Article about Suicidal Thoughts – Suicidal Thoughts, Sickness, Health, and Hope: A Personal Journey
  • Some Resources for You

Introductory Words

I’m not sure if you’re in a crisis right now because you want to kill yourself (if you are, you need immediate intervention), or if you’re just starting to have some suicidal thoughts.

But I want to help you.

I don’t want you to kill yourself.

I want to teach you to work through your problems, whatever they might be.

Solutions are out there. You just need some help finding them.

You also need to know you’re not alone! I’ve been where you are!

I even tried to kill myself once… and I will tell you about this whole experience in a minute.

For now, if you’re seriously in crisis, then call someone. Here are some international numbers (since I don’t know where you are in this world).

And please keep reading this article, because it contains a lot of good stuff in it!

Also know that I, too, have felt the pain, depression, isolation, and any other negative feelings you’re feeling right now. And I overcame them.

So can you.

And I will teach you how.

How? Read my story and use the exact same methods I used to change my life!

My story is 100% TRUE.

Bottom line? I tried to kill myself and I failed.

I also thought about killing myself for many years afterward but chose not to… because I didn’t want my son to be without a mom.

He is the only reason why I am still here today.

But the methods I use to stay positive and happy are the reason I am successful now

If You Are in Crisis 

i want to kill myself

If you’re in crisis… and if you really want to kill yourself, read this right now. Please. I’m serious. Read it NOW.

If you’re still thinking about killing yourself, that’s good – that means there’s a small part of you that has hope and wants to live despite the crap you’re going through.

The fact that you’re here is GOOD.

Please stay; I want to share my experience with you,  AND I WANT TO HELP YOU.

I wanted to kill myself, too. And I tried to when I was 15.

If you are a teenager, and you want to kill yourself, I have something to tell you. You’re brain isn’t done growing yet! It’s true! It will stop growing around age 21. Also, the feelings you’re having are totally and completely natural. Yes, you’re normal, believe it or not! And there are tons of places that can help you. Trust me. I may not know you, but I know what I went through when I was a teen and was raped. I have also been through a ton of other stuff in my life, and I have overcome many obstacles to get where I am today.

I’ve suffered addictions to both drugs and gambling. I’ve had bad jobs. I’ve been involved in prostitution. I am a single mom. I’ve had a really rough life. BUT I OVERCAME ALL OF MY PROBLEMS! 

If you’re an adult, please know that you’re not alone. There are people who can help you. Anytime, day or night.

Just call a hotline. Here’s one. If you don’t like that one, here’s another resource for you. In fact, nowadays, there are tons! Google search is your best friend. Try using it. Don’t be afraid.

If you’re in emotional pain and aren’t sure what to do next, then stick around and read my story.

My Life Was Awful

I don’t know what you’ve been through, but you’re not the only one who’s hurting. I’m hurting, too. You see, when I was almost fifteen, I was raped. I was a virgin at the time, too.

To top it all off, I was raised in a Catholic household where I was expected to save my virginity for marriage.

After I was raped, I also got involved with drugs and prostitution (as a way to cope with the emotional aspects of being raped)… before getting two university degrees while raising a son as a single mom. So yeah, I’ve been through A LOT.

I’m going to share my experience with you, and if you feel like it, you can share yours, too. Tell me your problems in the comments and I’ll do what I can to help. I promise.

How I Tried to Kill Myself (and What Happened)

When I was 14, I was a virgin. I had a fight with my dad one evening and ran away from home. That night, I stayed with a friend of a friend. He was 29, and he ended up raping me.

When I was raped, my world was turned upside-down. I was devastated. I didn’t know what to do or how to act. I tried pretending nothing was wrong. I was crushed beyond belief. I felt like life was not worth living, and I wanted to die.

I didn’t tell any anyone about it, either. I was ashamed and embarrassed, and I didn’t know who to tell or what to say.

The Kid’s Help Phone line wasn’t founded until 1989, and I was raped in June of 1986. (I was 15 then. I am 45 now.)

To cope with my devastation, I did a few things. I started smoking marijuana, began drowning my sorrows by eating and escaped my feelings by sleeping more. I fell into a deep depression.

I also became promiscuous, looking for love in all the wrong places. I thought about killing myself, constantly. One day, I tried to…

Read More

The “One Lovely Blog” Award (AKA One Smokin’ Hot Blog Award) Gets This Lovely Blogger To Identify Her Rapist: Lorne Chabot

 

award image

THIS IS A ‘TRUE TALES TUESDAYS’ POST

Identifying my rapist is probably the most unconventional way of accepting an award, but somehow it makes sense for me, since part of the acceptance is to reveal seven things about myself.  Because I cannot simply just say, “I was raped,” and then tell you six more things about me, I decided to shift the focus and combine my acceptance of this award with telling you some things, intimate things, about my past. This is a True Tales Tuesdays post after all! Read More

Writing Is Therapeutic and Helped Me Cope With Being Raped

 

THIS IS A ‘TRUE TALES TUESDAYS’ POST

Most of this post was intended to be a guest post on The Gift Of Writing, but Claire didn’t think it fit her audience well, so I revised it and am sharing it with you since it is a true account of my views and experiences and also fits quite nicely with my True Tales Tuesdays posts! Besides, it was already written, and I didn’t want it to sit, unread, on my computer when it was meant to be read by others! 😉 Although it mentions a few personal things, it also speaks of a tragic event I endured – being raped.

I was raped when I was a virgin, two months before I turned 15. It took me years to deal with this, since I was devastated and didn’t speak about it for years. When I finally sought counselling, I learned several coping strategies. Writing was one of them.

I have always found writing to be therapeutic. Whenever I have to make a major decision, I make a pros/cons list and weigh my options. If my emotions are running rampant, or my thoughts are turbulent, I write out what I’m feeling and thinking. I get an indescribable sense of satisfaction from the mere act of taking pen to paper – even though we live in a technological era where computers and word processors are so much easier to use, especially in the editing process. Read More