Last Updated on: July 3rd, 2016
THIS IS A ‘TRUE TALES TUESDAYS’ POST
Last week, as most of you already know, I had surgery. Since I’m not even getting my bandages changed until Thursday, AND tomorrow marks the day I published my first post EVER on this blog, I thought I’d do something different today. By the way, I’m still in pain, and it just isn’t in me to blog much right now.
In fact, I wanted to do something special for my one year blogoversary (it’s tomorrow), but I just don’t have it in me to make a big production of it. Well, that’s a lie. I actually just created something special for Friday. Yep, I’m featuring myself this Friday! The post I was going to run this Friday has been pushed back to next Friday. So I’m getting back into the swing of things, finally. Since my surgery, I haven’t wanted to do much other than lay around and let Princess comfort me. I guess she knows how I feel; I took care of her for quite a while when she had problems.
Before I gross you out with some pictures, let me tell you that I’m actually rather disappointed with 2014 so far.
All of my plans are going down the drain this month. I’ve been depressed, sick to my stomach, and generally hate having obligations to live up to when feeling this way. I kinda screwed up, too, last week, when I had my post published on Carol Tice’s blog. Things went awry and I tried my best to fix them. I succeeded, to a point, thanks to many of you who left me a comment as a result of me sending out an email. Thank you for making things better for me. You have no idea how much I appreciate the fact that you took the time to read my guest post and comment on it. And read my email. You guys (and gals) are just the BEST! 😀
I’m having many mixed feelings about blogging right now. I think it’s due to my recent operation, though. Hopefully, I’ll bounce back soon. On one hand, I love blogging and all of the relationships I’ve formed with the wonderful people I’ve met this past year, but on the other, I’ve failed to meet my personal goals, the biggest one being getting my poetry book published (yeah, the one I wrote almost 18 years ago).
I still have not written a query letter to a traditional publisher. Yes, I want this book to be published that way, even though I’ll be self-publishing my own book of short stories (someday), as well as the memoir book I’m working on. (If truth really be told, I haven’t touched it in a while. Hopefully that will change soon.)
Actually, I haven’t been working on anything lately. I simply don’t have the will to do so. It’s actually kinda pissing me off. Yeah, I normally don’t cuss, either. Which just goes to show you how pissed off at myself I am. Ugh. With my recent surgery so fresh, I thought I’d take this opportunity to tell you about all of my operations; I’ve had many.
In fact, a comment I made to Belinda, the woman behind Busy Mind Thinking, prompted me to write about my accident. I didn’t want to, but she thought it might help people get to know me a bit better. I then wondered if I should just chronicle all of my surgeries, in case my medical records ever go missing or I end up with Alzheimer’s and need a few reminders about my life. So this week, I’ll simply list some of the things I’ve been through, and the week after next week I will let you in on the details of how I nearly lost my leg. (You’ll get the complete story, too. I wrote it as sort of a short story, but it’s a true one. I was thinking of using it in my book, too, but I’m not sure yet. I’ll have to see how things progress with that. In the meantime, I figured I’d simply publish it as a blog post; you all deserve to know about some of the hell I’ve been through. For now, I’ll speak about it briefly and factually, since it is part of my list.)
My List of Operations
It has been almost nine years since I was in a Ski-Dooing accident. I nearly lost my leg in February of 2005. In fact, I did lose some of it! I had two operations on it, and they removed a lot of flesh, approximately enough to equal the size of two meaty steaks. One big steak, for sure.
It took me more than six months to heal from these surgeries, and I had to learn how to walk again, spending some time in a wheelchair and then using a walker. I felt like an old lady, and I was only 33! My accident and surgeries caused my leg to be a bit deformed. I ended up doing a lot of self-loathing for a while. For years, actually.
My self-esteem suffered tremendously. I have finally resigned myself to the fact that I will never have a “normal”-looking leg again. I’m scarred for life. Physically, yes, forever, but emotionally, too. Most days it doesn’t bother me much, mentally.
I still experience pain on a daily basis. Some days are worse than others, depending on my level of activity. I have certain physical limitations. I am not supposed to lift heavy things. Climbing ten flights of stairs is out of the question. Sitting cross-legged is not an option any longer. I’ve also been told to stay of the sun for extended periods of time and to keep my leg constantly elevated. I have varicose veins in both of my legs, too, as well as a touch of arthritis in my joints.
Overall, I seem to be in rough shape, but I am grateful that I still have both of my legs. I know the situation could be worse. I could be dead. Or legless.
In 1998, I had an operation on my right hand. I had an abnormal bone growth – a bone spur – and the operation was not done cleanly. I ended up with an infection. Thankfully, I was living with a boyfriend at the time. He helped me with the chores and self-care that involved the use of both of my hands. He washed my hair and helped bathe me, since I couldn’t get my hand wet. Most couples have showered together at some point, so this wasn’t so bad. The good part was that I got out of doing the dishes! The most embarrassing part of this ordeal was having him brush my false teeth. It’s a good thing we were close to one another. He definitely proved his love for me while I healed.
When I was a child, I had my tonsils taken out. I had been coughing up chunks of white stuff, for a couple of years, off and on. Things were worse when I had a cold. I often complained and, finally, the doctors scheduled surgery. I can recall writing out a will. This was my very first operation, and I was terrified of dying! I think I was twelve years old at the time.
My next surgery was an abortion at age 16, followed by the removal of my teeth at age 22. At 33, I had two operations on my leg. At age 41, I had my appendix out. Remember my true story of How I Nearly Died?
A little over a year later, I had surgery on my leg… which I told you about last week and has coloured this post, too. The good news is that I’ve managed to write up a few posts and schedule them for the next few weeks. I’m not giving up just yet. 😉 In fact, next week’s True Tale is pretty personal. And a bit embarrassing. Stay tuned!
In the meantime, tell me about YOUR operations, if you’ve had any.
And sorry to gross you out with these pictures. 🙁